Monday, August 13, 2007

Reflections

Wow. I am at the end of this pregnancy. Almost. So much has occurred, and so much more still to come. I was enjoying a few minutes alone yesterday floating in the pool as J* took a nap and hubby vacuumed my car. As I was basking in the quietness of the water and watching the sun go down behind the tree-line, I became extremely emotional at the enormity of this journey, and well, frankly, just started to SOB. The real thing . . . heaving chest, tears, moans . . . I just let loose. And it actually felt good to cry. Cleansing.

I think I am ready for baby. I'm terrified of labor, but ready for the changes in our family that are inevitable. We spent yesterday as a family of three, from the time we woke up till we all went to sleep, probably for the last time. Just us . . . no inlaws, no family or friends . . . I don't even think the phone rang once . . . it just sort of happened that way. We were able to say goodbye to our old life and realize we are ready for our new life, plus one.

One thing I have to mention . . . all last week I felt incredibly good. Much better than any week I can remember in the 3rd tri . . . not overly tired, irritable, or uncomfortable Maybe it was from starting to walk on my treadmill again, or maybe its just the calm before the storm. Either way, I am grateful for it, because I feel well rested and more ready than before.

So now all we need is labor pains!

4 comments:

Suzy (ryan_suzy@sbcglobal.net) said...

Hi -
I know we don't know each other, but I got the link from your friend Wanda Burdick. Your blog as been a life saver for me. We have been through 4 fresh IVF cycles and 2 FET from donor embryo. We found out the 2nd donor embryo cycle failed today :( Thanks for keeping this entire experience real, you are the only person I "know" that has experienced IVF, adoption, and donor embryo. I really want to be pg. and am afraid if we go to live birth adoption that my body won't want to let that feeling go. I am afraid it wouldn't be fair to our adopted child if I keep feeling that way. I wish you the best of luck with the delivery, and if you have any words of advice for me, let me know :)

Earthchild618 said...

I am so happy that you got this time as a family of 3!

Good for you to cleanse...it is healing and refreshing!

I can't wait for you to make the announcement that doo doo is on his way!

To the above commenter Suzy, as someone who did IVF, Embryo adoption (all failing) and successful adoption: hang in there honey! You will be a mommy!!!

meddlingkidd said...

Suz,

I'm so glad you are feeling well rested and had that last, relaxing day as a family of 3. I can't wait to see pictures of your new little one!

Jen
meddlingkidd

Lottie said...

(((hugs)))

I am so very, very happy for you and how you persisted and survived down this road. You do us women proud.