Thursday, March 01, 2007

Embryo adoption . . . the story behind this pregnancy

Yes, my children are both adopted. My son is from Florida, and this kiddo in the making is from New Hampshire. We live in CT. We were matched with J*'s birthmother on March 17, 2001 and he was born on July 10th of that year. We were matched with KITM (kiddo in the making)'s biological parents in July of 2006, and he will be born in late August 2007. J* was a fetus at the time we fell in love with him. KITM was a 2PN frozen embryo, stored deep in a lab for about 9 years. We fell in love with him before he was even defrosted, or implanted, or had a heartbeat. J* and KITM were meant to be our children. Its just so obvious to us now.

As I mentioned before, we adopted J* after 4 failed IUI attempts, and broken hearts many times over. We didn't pursue IVF because of the out-of-pocket expense, my marginal psychological health, and for the sake of our marriage. Our beautiful son arrived, and I was over the IF stuff. I thought I had moved on.

Well, those that know me well enough, know that money is a big motivator (or deterrant in some cases) to do things. I started a new job in July of 2005, and oops, it had IVF insurance coverage. Jen/Meddlingkidd may remember our talk in the mall when we met that Spring about me taking this job. I flat out said I was taking it to get pg. And if it didn't work, we'd adopt, since this company also gives $10k reimbursement of adoption expenses. Of course, that fact that it was my dream job, and I love it really took a back seat to all this!

So, after starting the job in July, we did our first IVF in October of 2005. We were so naive. We were so hopeful. At retrieval, we were told I made 26 eggs! Perfect! Even the post-op nurse said we'd probably have a 5-day transfer. Well . . . not! Only 11 eggs were mature, only 2 fertilized, and they both died the morning of day 3. Cycle over right before Thanksgiving. Ouch.

After that horrendous cycle, I knew in my heart that my eggs were shit, and that was the ultimate cause of the IF. I'm fine with that. We'd adopt. At least we tried IVF, and had an answer.

Well, somewhere in my research to find a new domestic agency, I came across Embryo Adoption. I read an article, then another. I asked questions . . . and Jen/Earthchild (who I credit with all of this) told me she did it at her clinic in Long Island, and gave me great advice, and their phone number. I called right away, and got an appointment for a consult in January. There was no wait for embryos, so we chose our donors, and cycled in March. We had two beautiful blasts transferred, but unfortunately, it was a BFN. Bigger Ouch.

After contemplating whether to try again, all of a sudden there was a waiting list for embryos. So I put our name down just in case. I began looking for other sources of embryos, and found the answer . . . That's how we found KITM.


Earthchild618 said...

I am soooo thrilled that you decided to go ahead and do this! If you didn't take the plunge, your little one in your belly would never have been!

Can't wait to be a part of the next as a mommy to two!!

Anonymous said...


I just think you are the coolest! What lucky kids you will have.

Love, Sally

azjenn said...

It is so amazing all the different ways we are building our families. Gotta love modern medicine!